Moderator: We will be starting in just a few minutes. Stay tuned!

Anne Collier and Larry Magid: We are looking forward to answering all of your questions!

_______________________

Moderator: Good Afternoon and welcome to Viewpoint. Today, Anne Collier and Larry Magid, co-directors of ConnectSafely.org and co-authors of MySpace Unraveled: A Parents' Guide to Teen Social Networking, are here to answer your questions. Let's get started!

Anne Collier and Larry Magid: Great to be here! Shall we jump right in?

_______________________

South Riding, Va.: This Christmas will provide our family with a new computer and we are feeling pressure to give the old one to our 11 year old son. The only place to put this is in his room.

1) Should we allow this? 2) If so, what precautions could we to protect him from the scary things that go along with this privilege?

Thanks, Nervous

Larry Magid: Ideally it's best not to put a PC in a child's room but that advice stems from the days when PCs were all wired. These days a lot of kids have notebook PCs with WiFi and most kids have mobile phones so the notion that having the device in a public area of the house doesn't necessarily work these days. That's why it's important to educate the kids about Internet safety - help them develop the filter between their ears - so they take that knowledge with them everywhere!

_______________________

San Diego, Calif.: At what age is it appropriate to let my child start a facebook or myspace page?

Anne Collier: Both MySpace and Facebook have 13 as the minimum age for users of their sites, and the sites really aren't appropriate for younger people. You can tell your child that if kids under 13 set up accounts saying they're older, both sites say those profiles can be deleted at any time without notice. They have technology that detects discrepancies between the age a user states at set-up and the content of the profile. Parents who don't want underage kids on the sites often request deletions too. There are other, more age-appropriate sites and technologies for preteens, such as Whyville.net and Imbee.com, and they often socialize online with instant-messaging services and Google chat too. If they do use these (they're pretty compelling social tools for kids starting in middle school), you might want to ask if they're doing so only with friends at school, ideally those you know too.

_______________________

Alexandria, Va.: I know all about facebook and myspace, but what other sites are out there that I should be worried about? How to I keep on top of the newest online trends so that I can keep my child safe?

Larry Magid: I'm not sure you should be worried about any of them but there are other sites that you should know about. There are plenty of social-network sites besides MySpace and Facebook. They include Ning (which lets you set up your own social network or join one run by an individual), Tagged, Hi5, MyYearBook and others. There are also "microblogging" sites like Twitter and Plurk that let people post short comments in real time, almost like chat. The ones I worry most about are JuicyCampus.com that encourages anonymous gossip as well as Stickam that allows for live video chat. Here's a list of and links to a bunch of social sites in Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_social_networking_websites).

As for keeping up with things, the best way I know how is to visit and subscribe to NetFamilyNews.org that Anne operates. Anne keeps up with all the news stories and blog postings about family technology and keeps her readers up-to-date with the latest and most important news.

_______________________

Alexandria, Va. : How do I monitor what my child is doing on sites like facebook where I can't see her profile?

Anne Collier: You could establish your own Facebook account and "friend" your child. That may not go over terribly well, because teens have always had parent-free places where they could hang out, and - though it's changing - they've considered social-network sites spaces like that since before parents knew about them! Just like always, in this online space too, parents and teens have to negotiate how much privacy teens should have, based on maturity and trust levels.

One idea might be to say to your child that you don't really want to monitor her Facebook profile behind her back, but you do need to know that things are on the up-and-up there. So you'd like to click around it and her friends' profiles a bit with her right there, just for a few minutes some evening, then you won't insist on friending her or on frequent spot checks.

_______________________

Centreville, Va.: This has to be one of the silliest subjects I've seen. There is no such thing as on-line predators. Do you all realize the problem is resolved as simply as logging off the PC??? I wonder if this same hysteria was around when the telephone became main stream. Same principle. HANG UP IDIOT. The internet has added no new threats to our society. The same good measures apply to the internet as they do to anything. Don't give out info like your full name or address. Would you volunteer this info to someone over the phone? NO. So why would you over the internet? What we have here is people trying to create an industry or jobs for a problem that doesn't even exist. It's in the same category as Y2K. NON-EXISTENT.

Larry Magid: Hi. I understand your point. Predators can't reach through a screen and exploit a child. The child needs to be online, needs to interact with the predator and needs to take some action such as getting together with that person. For that reason, the number of children who are actually harmed by a predator is very low -- certainly much lower than the number of children harmed by predators they know from the "real world."

However, I don't think logging off the PC is the solution anymore than getting out of the pool is the solution for possible drowning. We need to continue to educate kids not to be vulnerable. So far that seems to be working. Kids are a lot smarter and a lot safer than a lot of people realize. Having said that, I do worry about cyberbullying and self-destructive behavior but not so much predators.

_______________________

Hamburg, N.J.: Is it smart or sneaky for parents to have accounts on facebook or myspace to monitor their children's behavior? Should they use their real names, or aliases?

Anne Collier: I think it depends a lot on their relationship with their child, but we always feel it's a good idea to be up front about monitoring kids. There's a simple reason for that: If you monitor secretly and find something untoward, you have to talk with your kid anyway, and usually that's an even less constructive conversation than a calm, rational one up front. I say that because kids who are "found out" usually feel cornered and get pretty upset. That's not an easy way to start talking about tough issues.

If you have a really trustworthy child who's generally kind to his peers, doesn't spend all his time on-screen, and seems pretty healthy and balanced, he probably doesn't deserve to be monitored electronically or hovered over in other ways. But if a child's spending a ton of time online, is secretive, sleep-deprived, seeming either depressed or overly happy, and refusing to talk with you about it, it would probably be very smart to monitor his online activity.

As for real names or aliases, real first names are ok, but there's certainly no reason for them to use their full names. They just shouldn't.

_______________________

New York, N.Y.: As a current police officer, I have personally been blamed by many parents for the acts which have occurred against their children. How much blame or responsibility do the parents share versus the police, teachers, and others in the community?

And how can those 3 groups of people work more effectively in concert with one another to prevent these heinous acts?

Larry Magid: Hi - Well, as a police officer you're part of the solution, not part of the problem so there is no need for anyone to blame you. Sheesh.

I know this sounds a bit non-traditional, but I think rather than talking about blame, we should be talking about responsibility and, at the end of the day, the responsibility falls to the young person him or herself, certainly if we're talking about teenagers. We need to start thinking of teens less and victims and more as participants in the social web. Most issues that teens face come as a result of harassment, bullying or bad behavior of other teens. I don't think this is a law enforcement issue as much as a cybercitizenship and behavior issue. I think police can help educate about cybercitizenship but we can't arrest our way out of this nor should the burden fall just on cops. All of us -- educators, doctors, therapists and of course parents -- need to play a role as must teens themselves.

_______________________

Miami, Fla.: How can we, as parents, guide our teens & preteens on appropriateness of YouTube videos. On YouTube, they can see everything from hurtful to sick videos and because it's on video, it doesn't feel "real" to the teens. I'm concerned that my daughter is watching & laughing at people getting hurt. Do others have these concerns?

Larry Magid: I love YouTube and so do a lot of kids but -- as with just about any content -- parental discretion is advised. I don't think you can "protect" your kids from everything that might be offensive but, by viewing YouTube together, you can perhaps turn some of the questionable content into teachable moments by discussing it with your child. YouTube tries to ban any sexually explicit content and hate speech but relies on users to let them know about it, so if you see any, be sure to click the FLAG button to flag it as inappropriate.

_______________________

Syracuse, N.Y.: Is there a way to curb lewd use of smart phones and iPhones among teens? Mobile phones make it easy for kids to engage in all types of online behavior anywhere, anytime and it can get shared instantly. kind of scary...

Anne Collier: All of the US's major mobile carriers now offer parental controls - including blocking Web browsing, specific phone numbers, and in some cases media-sharing (I listed them in this blog post last spring http://www.netfamilynews.org/2008/05/what-mobile-carriers-need-to-do-for.html) - so you can check with your carrier (AT&T, Verizon, etc.) to see what's available on your child's service. It is a little scary that teens in a lot of states have shared nude photos of themselves and others at school; I've written about this quite a lot as we've all been trying to get a handle on it - here's the latest piece I've blogged http://www.netfamilynews.org/2008/12/is-sexting-teen-trend-study.html). We'd love it if you or anyone here would like to talk about this in the ConnectSafely forum http://forum.connectsafely.org.

_______________________

Miami, Fla.: I've asked my preteen to refrain from "communicating" with people she doesn't know on the internet. Her response is that she knows more than I do and she's not "stupid" and knows how to handle herself. I'm concerned that she is an innocent and may be giving or getting info that puts her at risk. What do you suggest?

Anne Collier: Well, one way you could approach it is to say something like, "Of course you're not stupid, and I know that you know how to handle yourself and do so very well as far as I'm aware. But I have some concerns for your safety and I feel I don't know enough about where you go online to be assured of it, which is my job as a parent. So I'll let you show me that you're not communicating with strangers online - how do you want to do that?"

One thing you could do, then, is to go through her instant-messaging buddy list(s) and/or social-networking friends list together, as she tells you who everyone on them is (if she doesn't have any idea who someone on the list is, you could suggest she delete the person). Worst case (for her) might be to suggest the possibility of monitoring software if you can't have a calm, grownup conversation up front about this stuff.

_______________________

Niagara Falls, Canada: How do you talk to your kids about their use of networking sites, especially if you know that they are overexposing themselves, or taking part in dangerous cyber activities?

Larry Magid: Good question and what we spend a lot of time on at ConnectSafley.org where there are lots of tips on this subject (http://www.connectsafely.org/code/code/). Bottom line, use your parenting skills and enter into a conversation with your kids. Do more listening then talking -- kids often have their own solutions. Try not to shut down their use of these services or scare them. I agree that "over exposing" can be a bad thing but just giving out personal information online doesn't necessarily correlate with being a victim. Obviously kids need to be careful about the type of photos they post and discreet about giving out too many personal details but millions of kids are on these services. Many do give their school name and a little info about themselves and, despite all the fears, there have been very few serious problems. Kids should, however, be warned not to reveal anything that would embarrass them now or in the future.

_______________________

New York, N.Y.: How do you think the lack of legislation on cyber-crimes affects the safety of young internet-users?

Larry Magid: Actually there are plenty of laws on the books that can be applied to cyber crime. For example, harassment is already illegal in most jurisdictions and there are laws that prosecutors can use if necessary. There are also statutes that apply to telecommunications which can and are being extended to the Internet. I worry about too many cyber-laws enacted by legislatures that don't fully understand the Internet and how it is used. For example, many State Attorneys General want to enact age-verification laws to control kids' access to social-network sites. On the surface that may sound like a good idea but on reflection it may have some bad unintended consequences (aside from being really hard to do). I'm not saying that policy makers and legislators shouldn't be thinking about how to protect people online, but I do think they need to first look at laws on the books and then think long and hard before enacting new laws.

_______________________

Boca Raton, Fla.: My son made sure that his MySpace site is off limits to parents after we started to monitor activities that were of concern. How can parents know what their kids are doing on My Space when kids don't want to allow them to do so?

Anne Collier: I kind of answered this above, but it's an important question. I really feel Net use needs to be put into the context of "real life." His offline social life is only partly "off limits" to you, right? The same should be true of his online social life. Kids do need a degree of privacy, but they also mature into meriting more and more of it. And parents need to be involved to varying degrees in their social lives, right? Because they usually involve driving cars, socializing in public places, etc., etc., and safety is an issue.

If you feel the need to spot-check his MySpace activity occasionally, you can have a rule about that. You could let him pick how he makes his profile available to you - with you next to him at the computer (where he knows what you're seeing), or with you setting up an account and being on his friends list (which would probably be less palatable for him). I hope that helps. Come back at us if not - you can follow up anytime in the ConnectSafely forum (http://forum.connectsafely.org), and feel free to ask for one of us to answer if you'd like.

_______________________

Washington, D.C.: Aren't there special privacy rules for marketers and advertisers targeting children? Do any of the social networks (MySpace, Facebook) post any warnings to their users about predators?

Larry Magid: MySpace and Facebook are among the companies that work with our non-profit, ConnectSafely.org and they do post safety advice about all sorts of issues. Predators, as it turns out, are not nearly as much of a threat as many people think and while both sites do warn people about them, they are not a major problem on either site for the vast majority of kids, who are mostly just socializing with their school friends -- certainly nowhere near as big a problem as cyberbullying and other kid-to-kid behaviors.

As per marketing, there are some rules, especially when it comes to children under 13 who are covered by the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act (look up "COPPA" for details). Other than that, some services ban dating site or other "racy" ads from profiles of teens but there is plenty of marketing that goes on via the web so parents need to make sure that kids use their critical thinking skills when viewing marketing materials. I understand that advertising is the way much of the web is funded and I'm OK with that but no one should manipulate our children -- not criminals or even Fortune 500 companies.

_______________________

Houston, Tx.: My 17 year old daughter has a boyfriend she met through myspace and wants to meet him in person. I'm nervous that she will a.) be in danger meeting a stranger, essentially b.) she'll get her heartbroken when he turns out not to be the person she thinks he is. What can I do to protect her emotionally and physically?

Larry Magid: Very good question. If your daughter does meet this boy, make sure it's in a very public place and that she brings backup -- preferably an adult but at least more than one friend. Also, she needs to be careful during that meeting not to let things go too far.

As per getting her heart broken, well, I've never been good at giving personal advice -- I had mine broken by "real world" girl friends many times during my youth and that's part of growing up. I think as a concerned parent you'll do all you can to strengthen her against grief and comfort her when it happens.

_______________________

Newark, Del.: How can my wife and I tell if my child is being targeted? Are there things I should look out for?

Larry Magid: Look at your child's behavior. Is he/she being secretive, turning off the screen quickly when you pass by, staying up very late at night? These could be signs that she is engaging in a conversation with someone who is trying to groom her. Predators don't just pounce on kids, they groom them over time. But, as we said earlier, most kids don't fall for predators anyway. Talk with your kid to make sure she/he has good "Net smarts." Chances are she does. If kids take a lot of risks offline then there is a great chance they'll take them online. Those are the kids we worry about the most.

_______________________

Alexandria, Va.: I am more comfortable with my teen boy online than my teen girl. Am I right? Is it safer online for boys and girls?

Anne Collier: Where online predation is concerned, statistically teen girls are more at risk, but two huge qualifiers are needed here: 1) Only a tiny minority of online teens (and virtually no one 12 and under) is at risk of sexual exploitation as a result of Internet activity - maybe one in a thousand. That's still too many, but know that the risk is very low and the kids who are at risk are those who are at risk offline - usually those living in places of abuse or conflict and so they're looking for support and validation in all the wrong places. 2) It depends on what you mean by "safe." Depending on the study, anywhere from a third to three-quarters of online kids are at risk of being harassed or bullied online, and girls are more likely to engage in online bullying than boys, statistically. Anyway, if you're even asking this question, your kids are probably going to be just fine online - because they don't fit the profile of at-risk online teens who aren't lucky enough to have engaged parents (for more on this, see "Profile of a teen online victim" http://www.netfamilynews.org/nl070518.html#1).

_______________________

New York, N.Y.: I was wondering if you have any suggestions with respect to teaching kids how to filter information sources that they use for school or to satisfy their own curiosity. There's a lot of info out there, and a lot of it is contradictory; for example, Wikipedia content changes all the time, and can be changed by anyone. How do I use that as an opportunity to develop their critical thinking skills, and also help them develop a "nose" for quality resources?

Larry Magid: Very good and important question. Although there is a great deal of good information on the web, there is also a lot of junk. I think it's all about critical thinking and getting multiple sources and knowing the reputation of the source. By and large, you can trust media companies to do what they've always gone which is why I do trust what I read at sites from reputable organizations like the Washington Post, New York Times and my own company, CBS News (I'm the CBS News tech analyst) although even there there can be mistakes are made and, in rare cases, writers or reporters who don't follow journalistic ethics.

It is also important to teach kids (and the rest of us) about the difference between opinion and fact. Lots of people state opinions which may differ from fact. I was watching a YouTube video of pundits who, two years ago, said how our economy was in great shape and that the stock market would rise and there was no chance of inflation. Obviously, their OPINION turned out to be wrong even though they were saying them in reputable outlets.

Anne Collier: I agree with Larry about how vital critical thinking is - about behavior as well as information our kids are experiencing online. I had a great conversation with a school librarian in New England a while ago. She taught her kids how to filter information by having them search for several sources on the Web containing info about something they knew a lot about - a favorite band, sports team, hobby, company, site, etc. - then consider what was being said and whether it was correct. A few years ago, Wellesley College conducted a study with its students about critical thinking online - you may be interested in its results here http://www.netfamilynews.org/nl030530.html#Critical%20thinking.

_______________________

Cleveland, Ohio: Is it possible that my child's facebook page could impact her admission to the college of her choice?

Anne Collier: Sure it could affect her admission to college if - actually two big "if's" - the way she's presenting herself in her profile would be unattractive to the college of her choice and if its admissions office checks social-networking profiles. She might want to think, too, about whether her Facebook profile is somehow inconsistent with all that she says in her application materials. If they make her look like a first-rate student and upstanding citizen but her profile suggests otherwise, that could be a problem! If she says it's private, go online with her and have her check which privacy feature she's turned on. Sometimes young people are surprised by how public their profiles actually are.

_______________________

Boston, Mass.: Is cyberbullying considered a criminal offense? If it is, do you think teens would be discouraged if they knew the consequences?

Larry Magid: Some states have laws that cover cyberbullying but any type of threat or harassment probably violates other laws even if there are no Web-specific laws on the books to cover cyberbullying. There was the recent case of Lori Drew who was convicted of breaking a federal anti-hacking law by violating MySpace's terms of service when she harassed a teenager who wound up committing suicide. Here's my take on this (http://pcanswer.com/2008/12/08/prosecution-in-teen-suicide-misguided/) and more from Anne, including some ideas for using the case as a "teachable moment" (http://www.netfamilynews.org/labels/Megan%20Meier.html).

_______________________

Arlington, Va: You both seem very well informed. How do you keep up in such a fast changing industry?

Larry Magid: Both of us spend a lot of time reading research, news reports and blogs and talking with people in the industry. Anne puts together a wonderful newsletter and blog called NetFamilyNews.org where she summarizes much of this on a daily basis. It's a great way to keep up without having to be as obsessive as we are.

_______________________

Metuchen, N.J.: How can parents minimize the risk of a child becoming a victim?

Anne Collier and Larry Magid: It depends on what you mean by "victim." If you're talking about sexual predators, the overwhelming majority of cases (most sources say more than 80%) involve either relatives or people kids know in "real life." And even though predators get caught up in sting operations online, we know of very few cases where they actually victimize anyone. That's because kids are much more savvy than adults give them credit for.

Online well-being is less about victimization than about participation. How does your child use the Internet? With civility and a solid sense of community or is he or she mean or aggressive to other people online? Kids who behave aggressively online are more than twice as likely to report being victimized, the Crimes Against Children Research Center at UNH has found in its research (see Archives of Pediatrics & Adolescent Medicine http://archpedi.ama-assn.org/cgi/content/full/161/2/138).

_______________________

Seattle, Wash.: When I was young, chat rooms were all the rage. Now it seems that facebook and myspace have taken over. Do you have any inkling to the next big thing that might threaten our children?

Larry Magid: I don't see Facebook and Myspace as threats. I think that for most kids they're useful ways of communicating with people they already know. What is threatening is the misuse of any service. Kids who know how to behave online are going to be just fine but kids who take stupid risks, talk about sex online or get together with people they don't know could get in trouble in any venue.

I am more concerned with sites that are not run by reputable companies including some that operate from overseas. I'm also concerned about sites like JuicyCampus.com that encourage rumors and innuendos.

It's not so much about the sites but about how kids use them which is why we have lots of good tips at ConnectSafely.org.

_______________________

Washington, D.C.: I won't let my teenager on Facebook or MySpace. Is that a mistake? Should I?

Larry Magid: For most parents I do think it is a mistake. I think kids need to explore and communicate and if you don't let them, they may do it anyway without your knowledge. You need to think about what you are concerned about and talk with your kids. Of course there are always going to be very high risk kids who need an extraordinary amount of supervision or control but millions of kids use these sites everyday and most have good experiences and relatively few serious problems.

Anne Collier: I was recently listening to a panel discuss online safety at a major conference of tech educators. A very smart high school senior was on the panel. His parents don't allow him to use MySpace, he told us (he wasn't complaining, just stating a fact, to his credit), and most of his friends are on it. I didn't know all the facts, certainly, but it did seem to me that a young man (on an expert panel in a distant city) with a good head on his shoulders was losing out on normal peer socializing and thus being penalized for something his parents heard about MySpace. I felt this was unfortunate.

_______________________

Atlanta, Ga.: How do I maintain trust with my teen, but still monitor their online activities. I don't want to snoop, but I want to make sure she is safe.

Anne Collier: Larry says give her everything she wants. JUST KIDDING! I sort of answered this before, but I think we really need to be up front with our kids. That's what maintains trust - up front about our role, as we see it, as well as our expectations for theirs. It's our job to keep them safe. When we have concerns about their safety, we can calmly, lovingly explain our concerns and ask them for their input on how they can stay safe - online and offline. If you have a strong concern that she's communicating online with someone who has bad intentions, talk with her about it. If she's uncommunicative or getting secretive, tell her you're going to have to monitor her activity one way or another. There's monitoring software - a searchable database of such products - at GetNetWise.org (http://kids.getnetwise.org/tools/), where you can learn about them. Only if a child's completely on another planet where a parent's concerned would secret monitoring be merited, I think, but it would definitely be merited. Hope that helps.

_______________________

Tuscon, Az.: My son is a joker. He is very open with my husband and I. We have seen his myspace page and are ok with it (his jokes are not unkind or mean), however could it effect his ability to get a part-time job? or could a college admissions officer see it and take it out of context?

Larry Magid: I think a good sense of humor is terrific and I would hope employers and admission officers agree. If his jokes are not mean or in bad taste I would think they would show that he's a kid with a good sense of humor and that would be an asset. Of course, it's not a bad idea to balance his online "portfolio" with other things that may show his serious side but I think most employers and schools realize that social-network sites are just that -- social sites -- and not job resumes.

_______________________

Arlington, Va.: What about the mobile web? How can you monitor your child's activity there?

Anne Collier: There's mobile phone monitoring software available - I've heard of a product called MyMobileWatchdog. But a lot depends on what your own cellphone carrier offers. Check with your phone company to see what parental-control tools it has in place - filtering, monitoring, application-download blocking, etc. We have tips for mobile phone safety at ConnectSafely.org here (http://www.connectsafely.org/safety-tips/safety-tips/cell-phone-safety-tips.html).

_______________________

Boston, Mass.: What is the best way to begin discussing safety with my kid?

Larry Magid: I love this question. I think that the best way is to start as early as possible but not to preach to kids. Sneak it in as part of other conversations and don't isolate online safety from other things. Does your kid wear a bicycle helmet, floss his or her teeth and cross streets carefully? It's all part of the same type of critical thinking. Are you exhibiting good safety behavior yourself? Kids emulate their parents.

I think the most important thing is to maintain a dialog with your kids. Have dinner together as a family and spend time talking about values.

_______________________

Washington, D.C.: How can a parent stay up to date on the latest technology?

Larry Magid: There are many ways to stay up with technology. In fact, we each have blogs you can look at. Anne writes NetFamilyNews.org, which focuses on kids' use of tech and the Net, and I do general tech at PCAnswer.com. There is a lot of technology news at CNET.com, and of course most newspapers, including the Washington Post and the New York Times, have tech sections (the Times and Post are particularly good).

_______________________

Boston, Mass.: Of the social networks, which do you consider to be the most safe, and which do you consider to be least safe?

Anne Collier: I'm not sure how you're defining "safe," and no site on the user-driven Web can possibly be guaranteed to be 100% safe (from cyberbullying, predators, hate, user-produced porn, etc.) but some really work hard at it. I think a good rule of thumb is that the big, well-known services much in the news and much on law enforcement's radar - such as Facebook, MySpace, and YouTube - are safe for most kids (kids who aren't at risk in "real life" and have parents caring about what's going on with them online and offline). It's the littler or lesser-known companies that don't have much budget for customer service handling abuse reports and parents' complaints that might be a little more concerning. Lots of kids have multiple accounts on big and smaller, more specialized services, and what they use the Net for is very individual, so it's always a good idea to ask your child what his or her online experience is like. What sites and services does she use and for what purposes (producing and posting videos? Playing games? Social networking? IM-ing? Etc., etc.).

_______________________

Kalamazoo, Mi.: What are public forums and how do they put my child at risk?

Natick, Mass.: Are there recommended ages for the use of various kinds of technology (internet, cell phone, IM, etc.) and the amount of time kids should use these things? My kids are still young, but I want to be prepared to use these things responsibly as they grow older.

Larry Magid: There are no set ages. It depends on the child as well as the family budget when it comes to buying things like cell phones. I wouldn't consider a cell phone for anyone under 8 or so and I would supervise young children's use of the Internet in general. A good general guide broken down by age can be found at: http://kids.getnetwise.org/safetyguide/

Anne Collier: For portable devices, one measure of a child's readiness to use them is whether he or she is ready to be responsible for keeping it charged and on when you need to reach the child. Because kids want certain devices so much, they can be used a tools for responsibility development - parents and kids can have conversations about the fact that "this is your parent's phone as long as you're on the family plan, and - if we give you the privilege of using it - you need to show us you're ready to do so properly, remembering that it's primarily for keeping in touch with us. You also need to show us you can keep it charged up, use it in accord with school rules, keep it in good condition, and stay within your minute limits." Just an example - you'll have a better way to discuss it with you child, based not just on his or her age but other conditions that work for your family.

_______________________

Virginia Beach, Va.: What do you see as the next biggest threat to Internet Safety? Mobile?

Anne Collier: As the social, or participatory, Web gets increasingly vibrant, with the growing number of the devices and technologies available to users for whatever they want to do (produce, communicate, etc.), there are definitely new "frontiers" for online safety, but I just don't see these as threats any more than books and telephones (at one time new technologies) are seen to be - though they can be used as such by writers and phone talkers we have problems with. Technology really is neutral - like a bread knife. [But I'm rambling....] The new frontiers for kids to learn to be safe, civil, socially responsible, and mindful are virtual worlds (including gaming ones like Xbox Live and massively multiplayer online games, or MMOs, like World of Warcraft) and - as you asked - mobile phones, which are just mini connected computers now.

I think we need to move beyond all this messaging about kids as potential victims and see them as intelligent but developing participants in this highly participatory space. Where risk is concerned, the research shows that many, many more kids are at risk of being harassed or bullied by peers than harmed in any way by adults online. What puts them most at risk is aggressive behavior toward others. [See this item for more (http://www.netfamilynews.org/labels/online%20aggression.html).] Online, a bully can turn into a victim in about 30 seconds flat - it's called retaliation. That's why I used those words "civil" and "socially responsible" in ref to safety. You could almost say that digital citizenship is the real online safety for the vast majority of youth online. Here are our tips on dealing with cyberbullying (http://www.connectsafely.org/safety-tips/safety-tips/tips-to-help-stop-cyberbullying.html).

_______________________

Moderator: That is all the time we have for today. Thank you so much for being with us today.

Anne Collier and Larry Magid: Anne and Larry here: This has been a lot of work and a lot of fun, and we're really pleased there have been so many great questions. Please come and talk about all these great topics in our ConnectSafely forum (http://forum.connectsafely.org). Our thanks to all of you and our friends at the Washington Post for making this happen.

_______________________

---