Jacqueline L. Salmon (The Post)

• Anti-Drug Website • Families...and So On Archive • Recent stories by Jacqueline L. Salmon • Metro Section • Talk: Metro and Schools & Kids message boards • Live Online Transcripts • Subscribe to washingtonpost.com e-mail newsletters

Families... And So On
With Jacqueline L. Salmon
Washington Post Staff Writer
Monday, Mar. 26, 2001; Noon EST
This week: Teenage Drug Abuse
with Dr. Phillippe Cunningham

This week during Families... and So On, Post Metro reporter Jacqui Salmon and guest Dr. Phillippe Cunningham, consultant at the National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign of the White House Office of National Drug Control Policy, talk about teenage drug abuse. They will discuss how to talk to your kids about drug abuse, dangers of inhalants, and how to say no to peer pressure. How do you start a conversation about drugs with your kids?

Families...and So On, hosted by Washington Post families reporter Jacqueline L. Salmon, is a free-ranging and freewheeling look at the American family. This is the place to talk about the burning issues facing the 21st century family, such as whether the world really needs diaper-wipe heaters.

Dr. Phillippe Cunningham

Salmon's guest is Dr. Phillippe Cunningham, consultant at the National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign of the White House Office of National Drug Control Policy. He received his Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University. He is the assistant professor at the department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences Medical at the University of South Carolina. Cunningham is affiliated with the American Psychological Association, Association for the Advancement of Behavior Therapy, and the Association of University Programs in Health Administration.

Tha transcript follows...

Editor's Note: Washingtonpost.com moderators retain editorial control over Live Online discussions and choose the most relevant questions for guests and hosts; guests and hosts can decline to answer questions.

Jacqui Salmon: Hi, folks and welcome. I have with me Dr. Phillippe Cunningham, so let's get rolling. The movie "Traffic's" success at the Oscars last night tell us that drug use is very much on this nation's mind, and we'll talk today and kids and drug use. While youth consumption of drug and alcohol has been declining in recent years, it's still at alarmingly high levels. The average age for first use of marijuana is 13. Almost half a million young people use inhalants in any month. Ten percent of 7th through 12th graders surveyed reveal they have tried Excstasy in the past year. Twenty-five percent of 12th graders have tried binge-drinking. Not very pretty statistics.

Jacqui Salmon: Hi, Dr. Cunningham, and welcome. Let me start off by telling you about a scene I witnessed a couple of years ago. I was observing a three-day seminar that kids who'd been caught with drugs on school property were required to attend. In the morning of the first day, all of the kids there (most of them 10th graders at the time) admitted they'd started drinking and using drugs as early as the fifth grade.

But what shocked me even more was that evening when their parents arrived for a briefing. They weren't told what their children had said earlier in the day. And several parents of the kids who'd told us they'd started drinking and using at the age of 10 and 11 were absolutely INDIGNANT at having to be there. They INSISTED their children had absolutely no problem with alcohol or drugs. They loudly blamed the school system for allowing kids who were "bad influences" on their children to remain in schools and demanded that their children be allowed back to school immediately.

I was horrified at the parents' complete blindness to the trouble their kids were in, but the counselors told me that it was a fairly typical reaction.

And I wonder...do you think falling drug and alcohol consumption rates among kids in recent years have lulled parents into complacency? Have we dusted off our hands and decided that the problem has been brought back under control?

Phillippe Cunningham: I don't about complacent. I think there is a disconnect between what parents think their kids are doing and what kids are doing.

There was a recent study where about 20 percent parents said their kids were using, but when you asked the kids, 50 or 60 percent of the kids said they had used at some point.

Jacqui Salmon: A quick announcement, folks. Dr. Cunningham has to leave by 12:45, so send in your questions NOW. He says he can come back, so I'll reschedule him for another time.

Jacqui Salmon: Do you think the movie "Traffic" is one that kids should see because of its antidrug message?

Phillippe Cunningham: It's one that PARENTS should see. It highlights parents' naivete around what kids are exposed to. Most kids are at risk, even kids from well-to-do families. It also highlights a critical role that parents need to play in their kids' lives-and that's knowing what their kids are doing and who they're with.

Kids who aren't monitored are liable to do inappropriate things, as the movie highlighted.

Jacqui Salmon: I know this is an obvious question, but I think a lot of parents still don't like the answer: At what age should we start talking to our children about drugs and alcohol?

I know the answer is: A lot earlier than most parents want to...but HOW much earlier and how do you initiate those discussions if your child doesn't bring them up?

Phillippe Cunningham: I think late elementary school is good. As for WHEN to talk, because of the number of antidrug messages in the media, when you're watching TV with your child and one of these messags comes up, it's a great time.

You don't have to be descriptive with a young child. You can just say "It's inappropriate. I don't want you to do it." And you can emphasize the harmful effect of drugs on kids--and people.

Teaching the basics of living a good live-honesty, integrity, following directions, being respectful, managing frustration--but also teaching kids how to make choices is also important.

Parents don't think these are drug-prevention behaviors, but they are. They teach kids how to manage themselves day-to-day.

Parents also need to point out the differences between prescription drugs and illicit drugs.

Jacqui Salmon: Is there really a prime age to start, though?

Phillippe Cunningham: Around 10 years is a good time to really talk about specific drug effects-alcohol, tobacco, illicit drugs and the risk involved and the long-term effects. But also the problems that drugs have on our community and our society. Kids can begin appreciating that.

It's also a great time to role play with kids ways of refusing drugs.

Jacqui Salmon: You mean at a party where they're offered booze or a joint?

Phillippe Cunningham: They can say, "My parents will kill me. It would upset my parents."

And role-playing this can really strengthen the bond between parent and child. Children know they're loved when parents take an active and sustained role in their life.

I think parents play such a pivotal in children's lives! Somehow parents have gotten the message they don't count, and that is so far from the truth.

Shreveport, La.: My 16-year-old daughter was smoking weed, drinking and taking cortisidan (spell?) at the same time. She became disoriented, so I took her to an acute care hospital. She was disoriented over a week. She stayed at this hospital for three weeks, then they shipped her to a state mental hospital where she's been now for almost two months. They had her on Haloperidol, Lorazepam, Olanzapine. The side effects of these drugs were terrible, so I made them take her off of them. She's now on a new drug called Ziprasidone, which is working very good on her. She cries sometimes. So the psychiatrist wants to keep her there. They did a EKG on her, and her brain is normal. She's in the highest level of English for her grade at the school at the state hospital. She can function just fine. Her Dr. told me if I try to release her that he'll take me to court. She's OK. Just sometimes cries about being there. What should I do? Thanks

Phillippe Cunningham: My general response is that you can always get a second opinion.

But here's a longer answer, since I specialize in working with substance abusing delinquents and I often run into parents who are struggling to work with their children in these situations.

First, what do we know about what kids use? What are the factors associated with that?

Peer: The No. 1 predictor is associating with drug-using peers. It's the No. 1 predictor of relapse as well.

Individual characteristics: Thinking positively about the effects of drugs.

Family factors: Here's where monitoring, structure, parent-child bond comes in. If you don't know where your child is, and you're not setting limits and there is conflict at home, your child is at high risk.

School factors: Kids who are academically inclined tend to be at low risk. If kids aren't connected with their school, they're at risk.

Community: If kids are in a community that support a drug culture, they're at high risk.

To this parent, I don't know your child. But if I was treating her, I would ask what factors or group factors would be opportive in your daughter's life? That's how we begin treating kids with substance abuse problems.

Based on the risk factors, then we develop treatment plans accordingly.

Just generally, to any parent, if you want to keep your kid from using drugs, you need to know who their friends are, what they're doing. You need to monitor their activities, set limits. (And, by the way, setting limits means condemning behavior but loving the child.) You need to structure their time.

I always tell parents that kids need love and limits. They need parents to set up guard rails for them. Everytime a kid does something, there should be a consistent response.

Dallas, Texas: Dr. Cunningham:

My teen son tunes me out when I try to talk with him. What is a good way to speak with him in a way that he will listen?

Thank you, Jill

Phillippe Cunningham: Here are some general ideas. Find some moments to build up with your child. Get involved in their activities.

For some parents, the idea of playing with their kid is going in and rearranging the activity!

Find out what they're like, what they like and dislike. Know things like they're favorite color, who their best friend is.

Do you ever just smile at your child, hug them? Show pride in their accomplishments? Do you ever allow your child to teach you something. My eight-year-old daughter keeps trying to teach me how to dance!

Do you carve out special time just for you and your child? Just 30 minutes or an hour to check in and see how their day went.

Parents often think that kids aren't tuning in when parents talk, but they are. They may not ACT like but, but most kids think what their parents say is very important.

Washington DC: Dr. Cunningham:

You mentioned the distinction between presription drugs and illicit drugs. I have always referred to presription drugs or OTC ones as "medicine" around my children "Drugs" is used for those that are illegal or used illegally (for example, taking Ritalin for a high, as opposed to for a medical reason).

Phillippe Cunningham: Sounds good because, yes, I would say there are prescription drugs that are abused!

Ashburn, Va.: Dr. Cunningham-

What are your thoughts about parents who allow their children to drink in their homes and provide "lock-up" parties (where kids come to party/drink, but their keys are taken away) under the belief that it is better to provide them with a safe and supervised location? There were a couple of parents who believed strongly in this when my now 21 yr old was in HS.

On the same vein, how do we deal with hotel/motels that rent out rooms to young people for parties?

Thank you.

Phillippe Cunningham: These practices are clearly inappropriate. They're wrong. Kids need a consistent message around the dangers of alcohol and drug use. If you want your child to be drug free you need to be free where you stand on that issue.

This doesn't mean that these practices won't work for a lucky few kids, but for the vast majority of kids, it's a prescription for tragedy.

Buffalo, N.Y.: As a teen, I experimented with drugs. Should I be truthful with my daughter if she asks if I tried drugs?

Jacqui Salmon: This is a very good question for anyone who grew up in the '60s and '70s, and I don't think I've seen it answered satisfactorily. Do we answer the question with a simple 'yes' or 'no' and then explain? Or do we dodge the question? That's what I feel we're being told to do.

Phillippe Cunningham: You need to be honest with kids. You don't need to tell them all the specifics. But you can share with them how negatively it affected your life, and that your job as a parent is to help them not make the same mistake.

Guilt should never stop you from doing your job as parent. As my pastor says, "there's never the wrong time to do the right thing."

Hartford, Conn.: What role do you think the entertainment media plays in promoting youth drug use?

Jacqui Salmon: Another good question. I am absolutely and unalterably convinced that a steady diet of violence coming from TV, movies, video games etc. affects kids, but I do believe the mass media have gotten better in recent years in portraying drug use in less approving ways. (I'm remembering "Animal House," the cult movie of my generation that definitely glorified excessive drinking and drug use!) Are you seeing more of an effort on the part of movie-makers, etc. to keep positive images of drug use off the screen?

Phillippe Cunningham: The research is pretty clear. It has an influence. It is a risk factor for drug use, violence, generally anti-social behavior.

How drugs and violence are played in the media can have a profound impact on kids and the choices they make. That's why it's a great idea for parents to monitor what movies and videos kids see.

I like to tell paents that it's analogous to someone trying to sell the something through ads with a lot of bells and whistles to get your attention. Looking at it that way, you can see that the media can have an effect on kids' drug use--or non-drug use, for that matter.

That's why it's a good idea for parents, when they're watching movies and tv, to help their kids become 'media-literate.' What is the message the media is trying to send? Parents can say "I think that is wrong' if they see something they don't like. If a movie is glamorizing drug use, a parent can say 'what they're not showing is....'

Jacqui Salmon: Tell us about the antidrug campaign. What's different about it than previous campaigns and why do you think it's got a better shot at success than previous campaigns?

Phillippe Cunningham: It's got a better shot, I believe. It's based on solid research. And the major component is empowering parents to effectively prevent drug use in their kids. I'm a fan.

As a parent, the slogans really caught my eye! It demonstrates real ways that parents can stay involved with their kids, how to set limits. One of the major elements is that it really highlights the importance of parents in kids' lives and that hasn't really been a focus before, as far as I know, in anti-drug campaigns before.

Also, it's brought together a lot of different groups that are getting on the same page as to what the message should be. It's a very comprehensive campaign.

Wheaton, Md: I'm horrified by what you experienced at the 3 day seminar. So much for the boomers making the world a better place.
What can those of us without kids do to stop this drug madness? It makes me sick to think of all these parents being so clueless about drug use by their kids and its affect on society in general.

Phillippe Cunningham: It really does take a village to raise a child. So if you want to do something, be a good neighbor. It's something we should all strive to do. We need to be involved and supportive in the lives of our neighbors. And we need to help people lead productive lives.

If you see a child doing something inappropriate, let that child's parent know! I think it's a misconception that child development is only the responsibility of parents. It's also the responsibility of our community, neighbors, and our churches. Two parents can't monitor children 24/7. A neighbor can say "I saw your child doing..." and parents can do something about it.

Also, there are many groups in your community that would love a good volunteer. Mentor a child! Every child needs one person who has an irrational desire to see them succeed. In my church, I'm always encouraging men to spend time with one child outside their family. If a child has one adult involved in their life, that child has a better chance of success. They call that resiliency.

Jacqui Salmon: Hi, folks. Dr. Cunningham had to run to catch a flight, but we'll have him back sometime this summer. Thanks for the good questions and comments, including the ones that didn't get "on air." I especially liked his advice on how to help your child turn down drugs/alcohol by role-playing with them and suggesting responses like "My parents would kill me." I didn't get a chance to ask him, but I'll bet he would suggest that we see if our CHILDREN have any ideas on a good response that they would feel comfortable with in that situation. If anyone's child has had experience in this situation, let us know how they handled it and what they said, and I'll post them next week. Also next week, we'll hear from Parent's Magazine senior editor Deborah Debrovner about children and reading. And don't forget that Tracy Hogg, author of "The Baby Whisperer" will make a special return appearance on April 9 to take more questions on calming infants. I saved your questions from her previous appearance, so she'll get to some of them, too!

   |       |