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Got Plans?
With the Entertainment Guide Staff
washingtonpost.com
Thursday, Sept. 20, 2001; 1 p.m. EDT

In addition to your advice, we need your observations. How have you witnessed people making themselves feel better? What are you and your friends and family doing to feel better? Is the coming weekend a time to go out with friends or best spent quietly at home.

We of the Entertainment Guide continue to focus on the information sharing aspect of our jobs. We are collecting as many listings for benefits and cancellations/postponements as we can; and if you know of either, please, drop us a line. Remember to include the name, date and location of your event and a contact number, we'll spread the word.

We are ready to answer questions about going out and make recommendations, but this week we'd like to turn the tables. Is it appropriate to go out and if so, what should we do?

Editor's Note: Washingtonpost.com moderators retain editorial control over Live Online discussions and choose the most relevant questions for guests and hosts; guests and hosts can decline to answer questions.

The Going Out Gurus: Thank you for joining us this afternoon. Maura, Alexa, Joe, Rhome, Stacy, Jen, Anne and I are ready to exchange observations and opinions. This is Kate, and I'll be hosting today. I'm planning on going to the Phillips Collection on Saturday morning to see the "Impressionist Still Life" show. I understand that the museum has been unable to procure several of the paintings, including the Cezanne on the catalogue cover. Apparently the show has been hung as planned and there are blank spaces on the walls. I couldn't imagine it any other way.

Rockville, MD: I know that for me, staying in the house is no longer an option. I don't want to live my life in fear anymore. I find it ironic that in light of recent events, we are all afraid of living our lives. That's exactly what they wanted to accomplish. We should be savoring every precious moment we have here and the people we have to share it with. I went out last Thursday night, just for my sanity, but it was just to Silver Diner. I think going out to dinner and movies is fine right now...

The Going Out Gurus: Thank you for writing in.

SW DC: First off, thank you for taking my question. You guys are great.

My wife and I have had several very good experinces at Bistrot du Coin, and we were planning on meeting another couple there next weekend. Both of us have young children, and we want to bring them to the resturant. However, I've heard that the resturant isn't child friendly, and they discourage people with kids from eating there. Is this true?

The Going Out Gurus: Hello SW DC, this is Alexa. I'm sure Bistrot du Coin has its merits, but I'm not sure if being children-friendly is one of them. Have a read of this.

Arlington, VA: What sort of security measures will high-profile, high-traffic, cultural sites and tourist attractions in the DC metro area like the Kennedy Center, museums, monuments, etc. take in the wake of the attacks on Sept. 11, if any?

The Going Out Gurus: Hi Arlington. Maura here. Many cultural sites are already taking extra precautions in the wake of last weeks events. You can't help but notice increased security presence at museums and monuments. This weekend I noticed all Smithsonian museums were checking bags and I am sure this will continue for some time. The MCI Center and the Patriot Center at George Mason are also taking extra precautions. At the Patriot Center, no backpacks, luggage, packages, briefcases or "similar items" are allowed.

Washington, DC: Last weekend, the tough question was "do I go out?" Well, my friends and I did. We went to Polly's in downtown- and it was great. After playing "Born in the U.S.A.", the entire crowd starting chanting "U.S.A."- and it was one of the most amazing moments. I think people are going out, people are having a good time, but we are not forgetting what is going on. We have bonded together more than ever. I think going out is good for people- get out there and meet your fellow Americans.
My question- there is supposed to be an a-capella concert at Lincoln Memorial on Sunday. Do you know of times (I heard 10) and also when I should get there to enjoy it? They are also going to be collecting money too. Thanks gurus!

The Going Out Gurus: This is Kate. Yes, Washington eight local a cappella groups and barbershop quartets perform on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial this Sunday. TakeNote!, Drastic Measures, DC Accidentals, the King's Chorders, the Chromatics, 66 West, BlueLine and ReVerb (my favorite) are the featured acts. Organizers urge spectators to wear red, white and blue. The national anthem will be sung at 10 a.m.; the concert finishes at 3 p.m. There is no charge, but the groups will be accepting donations; all proceeds will be split among charities.

This was one of the earliest benefits we heard about and I'm sure the crowd will be large. For other fundraising concerts check our master list of benefits.

Washington, DC: I've heard it suggested that one way to speak out against anti-Afghanistani-American bias is to find an Afghan resturant and go to dinner there, and I'd love to do this -- But I don't know where one is or even what the food's like! Any suggestions in the Northern Virginia or DC area?

The Going Out Gurus: Yes, Washington, Alexa here. There's a good one on Route 1 on the Alexandria/Arlington border, simply called Afghan Restaurant.

Washington, D.C.: While it may be inappropriate to call it a "happy" hour this Friday, I think it is a good opportunity to separate yourself from the events and be with friends and co-workers. Lately, I have found myself retreating home to the news too often, and am looking forward to the break.

The Going Out Gurus: And it might even be okay to laugh--especially if you go the Source this weekend. The Washington Improv Theater is donating all of its weekend profits to the United Way's September 11 fund. Shows are at 9:30 p.m. Friday and Saturday.

U Street: Taking the father-in-law out for his 60th birthday, and we're looking for decent, authentic Italian restaurant. Downtown DC or NoVA; party of five; not too expensive; no Bertuccis, Maggianos, or Bucca di Beppos. Suggestions?

The Going Out Gurus: Hello U Street, Alexa again. We always tend to suggest any of these: Il Radicchio, Geranio, Etrusco, Al Tiramisu.

Washington: Of course it's appropriate to go out. And it would help if the Washington Post and washingtonpost.com returned to their usually excellent coverage. For instance, I have read nothing about the new Black Cat, the new Carpool in Reston, or the two new restaurants on Capitol Hill, Montmarte (sp?) and the reopened Tunnicliff's. I realize that your coverage has changed to reflect all the events and cancellations that have occured in the last week, but when will you get back to normal? Some people in this city, myself included, would like to continue to live our lives.

The Going Out Gurus: I agree, Washington. This is Fritz (just back from a lunch meeting), and I think we're slowly beginning to get back to the "usually excellent coverage" you graciously speak of. Eric Brace is writing about the new Black Cat in tomorrow's Weekend section. I've been to (and reviewed) the new Carpool in Herndon, but it hasn't run yet because we've been busy with other, larger matters. This issue is key to the subtext of today's discussion: what is "normal"? And when (if ever) will it return?

Germantown, MD: I think everyone has to move at their own pace as we all react to things in a different way. Personally, I think that spending time with loved ones - friends, family, significant others - is important at a time like this. We can not let these events, and these horrible people, stop us from continuing our lives. We must always remember what has happened and the loved ones we lost. We must not let the terrorists win and destroy us.

The Going Out Gurus: Hi Germantown, Kate here. The E Guide staff meet on Monday and we talked about what we'd observed people doing over the weekends. Movie theaters and large shopping areas, I believe appeared less crowded. Alexa noticed large numbers of families in parks. Perhaps planning a picnic with friends in an area green space would feel good.

Dupont: Great suggestion on the Afghan restaurant! Any other suggestions on places to go where we can show our support for Arab-American's and let them know that not all American's are jerks?

The Going Out Gurus: Dupont, Alexa again. Let's ask the group.

LeDroit Park: Another yummy Afghan restaurant is Panjshir in Falls Church.

And as far as to go out/not to go out: Go, even if you have to ease back in. We ventured out Thursday night for dinner, then brunched at Polly's on Saturday and walked around U Street and 14th. It felt good to be away from the TV, but we also felt like we were helping to reassure shop and restaurant owners that commerce goes on. Consider giving dollars to charities supporting victim's families and rescuers, but spend your dollars, too, to help our economy.

The Going Out Gurus: Here come the suggestions. Thank you.

Washington, DC: Just an observation about the city life here in DC after the horrific events of last Tuesday... life is still moving, venues are still open, and some people are still going out. From bars to clubs it seems that we are in need of getting out and interacting, even if we do have our guards up. However, I have noticed that obviously some people aren't in the mood for such revalry, but they're out trying to live their normal lives. Let's try to be concious and respectful of each other.

The Going Out Gurus: Well put, D.C.

MD: The Maryland Deaf Festval will be September 29 - 30, 2001 at the Montgomery County Fairgrounds http://www.mddf.org

The Going Out Gurus: Thank you for this information.

appalled: This is in response to the person that just blasted the Post for not having "normal" coverage. I understand s/he's frustrated. Denial is a typical reaction to a trauma of this magnitude. I myself have been waivering back and forth between feeling like we're talking about it too much and concerned that no one's talking enough. There are strong emotions that people are bottling up: anger, fear, intense sorrow -- pretending like none of this is happening is very different from acknowledging it and trying to work through it and move on.

Most importantly, each of us is handling this the best way we know how. That results in a myriad of different outlooks and opinions. S/he shouldn't be critical of the Post for addressing what they see as a higher need right now. Surely we all realize that while a few of us might want to hear about the new Carpool (blech, not me), a nation, nay a WORLD is hanging in the balance. The Post has a responsibility to try to find a middle ground, and they've definitely done that by returning many of their "normal" features, but let's face reality: writing about the new Black Cat doesn't make anything back to normal, no matter how hard you try to pretend it does.

The Going Out Gurus: Anyone else have an opinion?

Rosslyn, VA: Any info on bringing picnic lunches, dinners, etc.. to events on the Mall due to increased security concerns?

The Going Out Gurus: Hi Roslyn. This is Maura. It's my understanding that you can still bring your picnic lunches and dinners down to the Mall. If it is anything like last weekend, there should be plenty of space to spread out. Sunday's A Capella Benefit Concert will certainly have increased security, but I am sure you'll find many fellow picnicers there.

Annapolis MD: There is also a great Afghan restaurant in Bethesda - i forget the name, but it is right on Cordell, and in Annapolis, the New Moon Cafe is owned by an Afghani woman.
One thing we all should remember is that there are more Muslims in the US than there are in Afganistan and they are here for the same reason we all are - for freedom and to escape tyranny. And many Muslims are not Arabic and many arabs are not Muslim.

The Going Out Gurus: And more...

wiredog: Panjshir on Rt 7 in Falls Church is an excellent Afghan restaurant. I hear the one in Vienna isn't as good. Good Lebanese at the Lebanese Taverna in Arlington and DC.

The Going Out Gurus: Thanks wiredog.

Old Town Alexandria: Submitting early...do any of you or your readers know anything about some huge thrift sale that is suppose to be occuring this Fri and Sat in Leesburg at the 4-H grounds?

The Going Out Gurus: Hi, Old Town.
I (Jen) just did some research and got the skinny on the sale.
Yes, it is happening tomorrow (Friday) from 9 to 5 and Saturday from 9 to 12 at the Loudon County 4-H Fairgrounds. The fairgrounds are located on Dry Mill Road -- take Route 7, then exit at Route 9 and make a left onto Dry Mill into the fairgrounds.
It's sponsored by the ladies' board of the Loudon Hospital Center and, from what I've been told, there will be a ton of stuff for sale: furniture, clothes, toys, you name it.
This is an annual occasion and it sounds like a good opportunity to find some neat stuff.

Arlington, VA: Tacky, tacky, tacky, Mr. Washington! Think about your tone before sending in another post. This area shouldn't be used to attack the WP or WP.com.

The Going Out Gurus: Thanks Arlington. Kate here, I think this is a good forum for people to express their opinion of our performance.

Arlington, VA: I totally agree that it is okay to go out, but it doesn't feel right to "drink" away money during this time of crisis. An excellent event that I would like to suggest is the WSO's (Washington Symphony Orchestra) free concert on Sunday night at 7:00 PM in Meridian Hill Park, Lower Level, 16th& W St., NW, WDC.

The Going Out Gurus: Hi Arlington, this is Joe and thanks for your suggestion. There is also a free memorial concert being held on Monday at the Kennedy Center. Mary Chapin Carpenter, flutist James Galway, opera singer Frederica von Stade and jazz great Billy Taylor will perform along with the Opera House Orchestra.

VA: People also need to remember that one of the important functions of our way of life is a market economy - staying home, not spending in theatres, restaurants, or what have you, as you would normally is going to have a long-reaching effect, a negative one, on the economy. While it may be pushing it to label it a "patriotic" thing to do, it is important that we all don't resort to a hoard and hide mentality. We need to keep functioning as a society, since one of the main targets of terrorists is to destroy our way of life. Besides, we need the release.

The Going Out Gurus: Thanks VA.

Crownsville, MD: I was away during the events of the 11th and returned this past Saturday. I wasn't about to cut my honeymoon short because of the terrorism, that would be letting them win yet another small battle. I called family and friends to ensure their safety and to let them know my husband and I were ok and thinking about them. Then we continued on our journey, albeit with an eye toward cnn whenever possible.
This weekend we have plans and they will go on as scheduled. Life does go on, and I for one plan on living it every day.

The Going Out Gurus: Welcome home, Crownsville.

Silver Spring, MD: Well, I took my family to the MD Ren Fest this past weekend. IT was a welcome escape from sitting home watching the 2nd plane fly into the World Trade Cetner again. WE all just needed an escape where we could turn our minds off for a few hours. The MD Ren Fest was a great escapist activity. With the weather looking promising again this weekend, I'd reccomend it.

The Going Out Gurus: Thanks for the rec Silver Spring. What are you going to do this weekend?

Washington, DC: I think it's possible to go out and still remain respectful of last week's events. Maybe dancing all night and drinking until you puke is a tad inappropriate, but there a lot of dignified activities that get us away from our TVs:

-Check out a museum. Pick out a Smithsonian you've never been to and wander around.
-Go to historical sites or memorial sites that you have been meaning to see, like Mt. Vernon, JFK's grave, or the FDR Memorial.
-Instead of going out to clubs, spend a Friday or Saturday night at a retirement home and just listen to stories.
-Spend a Saturday walking down your street and picking up any trash in the gutters that's been piling up.

The Going Out Gurus: Good ideas all, Washington. Lots of people are choosing.

Another respectful way to spend time is at one of the various fundraisers going on around town. Have you considered the Washington Symphony Orchestra's concert at Meridian Hill Park on Sunday night? Or the Washington Chorus' performance at the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception on October 3? Those should both be stirring, beautiful events.

Tyson's Corner, VA: Well I haven't lost any friends or family in the WTC or Pentagon or PA plane crash, but a few relatives work in the WTC, and managed to get out.

What do I do to get my social life back in gear and get out and do "stuff" because lately I've just felt like sitting at home & watching a movie on TV....

The Going Out Gurus: Hi, Tysons, this is Anne. I'm so glad that your relatives found their way to safety. Still, I can only imagine how that close call made you feel. I'm sure a lot of folks are still feeling shaken, for we all have a lot to process. If you decide staying in is best for you, perhaps you'll want to tune in to Friday night's all-star fundraising special. Actually, if you're watching tv, it will be hard to miss, because so many networks will be broadcasting the same thing.

But, if you feel you would like to get out of the house, there's no shortage of options. To really gear up, take a ride around the city with Sunday's 12-mile Bike DC ride. You can register online at www.waba.org. Explore downtown D.C. culture with the free Arts on Foot festival, Saturday from 11-5. Watch Tappers with Attitude or a slew of music performers or take in a workshop at the Shakespeare Theatre's "Oedipus" set. Browse through works by local artists or the prop sale at Ford's Theatre if you're looking for a piece to brighten up your living room or wardrobe. Or maybe this is a time to call up a friend and make a date to catch up on the plays or exhibits you've been meaning to see.

Fairfax,VA: This is my story...you dont have to post this but i thought i'd share: my brother was supposed to be working at the Pentagon that day...he lays down electrical work for his construction company but he was at the White House that day...for 1 hour i thought i had lost my brother....i'm going to the movies with him this weekend for the first time since we were little...we're both adults now but i just need to be sure he knows im here!

The Going Out Gurus: Thanks, Fairfax. I (Jen) am glad to hear you and your brother will be spending some quality time together at the movies. A lot of people must have done the same thing last weekend since the box office intake remained pretty steady.
Speaking of movies, things have been really confusing lately. A lot of films that were scheduled to open on specific dates have been postponed or, in the case of the Schwarzenegger flick "Collateral Damage," put on the backburner indefinitely.
This weekend, for instance, the only mainstream wide release is the Mariah Carey movie "Glitter," which had been postponed from its originally intended August release date.
Oy, so confusing! Anyway, keep on checking in with our movies page and the Weekend section to make sure you know what's happening. I can tell you that next week looks a little more promising for those of you who seek solace in cinema: "Hearts in Atlantis," the celluloid version of the Stephen King novel starring Anthony Hopkins, and Ben Stiller's "Zoolander" are both opening on the 28th.

Fairfax: I half-heard something on the radio about a benefit concert on Monday night with Mary Chapin Carpenter?? Anyone heard more about this?

The Going Out Gurus: Mary Chapin Carpenter, opera singers Frederica von Stade and Linda Hohenfeld, the classically jazzy Billy Taylor Trio are joining other artists and the NSO for a free "Concert for America" this Monday in the Kennedy Center Concert Hall at 6 p.m. It is the most ambitious Millennium Stage performance yet. Donations will be accepted at the concert on behalf of the United Way September 11th Fund. And the performance will also be projected onto large screens in the Grand Foyer. Doors open at 5:30.

Fairfax: I worry about the people who cancel plans because their fright based on a rumor. That scares me more than anything -- we cannot hide. I am going to the O's game on Saturday with my family -- I cannot wait.

The Going Out Gurus: Kiss Cal for me.

Bethesda, MD: What's going on with Oktoberfest events?

The Going Out Gurus: This very weekend, Bethesda, there are two. Clyde's and the District ChopHouse and Brewery are each sponsoring one. The ChopHouse one is tomorrow night, and Fritz says they'll be tapping a new special beer there. Mount Airy is hosting an Autumn Festival, and there are many, many more fall festivals in upcoming weeks.

Woodley Park, DC: Of course it's fine to go out, let's not let the terrorists rule our lives.

I have a specific complaint about the new policy barring bags, briefcases, backpacks from the MCI Center. I usually attend a few Caps games each year, and since I work downtown I go there straight from the office. What am I supposed to do with my briefcase? It would be fine if they randomly searched bags, or did the metal detector thing, but barring them altogether seems an overreaction. I've got my asthma medication in my bag, glasses, umbrella... are we supposed to do without such necessities when we go to a game?

The Going Out Gurus: Hi Woodley. I just spoke to someone in the security office at MCI Center and they have indeed upped their security precautions for all events. You are allowed to bring in pocketbooks and small bags, but no briefcases or large gym bags will be allowed in the arena. And there is no place to check them so you would be wise to leave them behind. As for medication, glasses, etc., the security guards recommend transferring smaller items to small bags which will be thoroughly inspected at the door. Perhaps this might be a good excuse to leave your work behind as you head out the door...? If you have more specific/health concerns, you can call the MCI Center directly at 202/628-3200.

Washington, DC: Anyone who's ever complained about crowds at the galleries and museums on the Mall owes it to themselves to go down there this weekend. The places are deserted. You can actually spend some quiet, contemplative time with a beautiful work of art.

The Going Out Gurus: Yes, D.C., that is certainly true right now. Last weekend I (Maura) said a lonely farewell to Clyfford Still and stopped into a spookily silent Air and Space Museum. If you are up for it, it's a great time to see shows without the crowds. With new exhibitions like Explore the Universe at Air and Space and Virtue and Beauty at the National Gallery, I do think the crowds will pick up in the coming weeks.

Arlington, VA: Do you think there will be a permanent change in the type of entertainment that people will seek out? I definetly think that people, more now than ever, want to be entertained but forsee more "feel-good" tv shows/movies and less action/adventure type entertainment.

The Going Out Gurus: Hi, this is Joe again, and I think it's probably still too soon to answer this question. In the short run, I'd say that people are likely to look for entertainment that is reassuring or contemplative or maybe just a momentary escape. Personally, it still feels too early to me to dive back into things. Going out to a club or to see a band is low on my list of things I want to do right now. Maybe people want a return to normal, but I'm guessing that normal as we knew it doesn't exist anymore. Life has changed and I think ideas of what entertainment is, and should be, will change as well.

For U Street: Another tasty Tuscan sytle Italian spot is Argia's in Falls Church.

The Going Out Gurus: Yes, Alexa is a big fan of Argia's mushroom ragu.

Adams Morgan: Just moved to the Adams Morgan area and love the diverse mix of ethnic restaurants. I've tried Ethiopian, Indian, Thai, etc. and they are all wonderful. However, mysteriously missing is a place where I can get a good old burger and fries. Any suggestions?

The Going Out Gurus: Some speak well of the burger at the Duplex Diner. Otherwise, I (Alexa) would say that a pilgrimage to the 'burbs is necessary. Five Guys is king.

Rockville, MD: (I apologize if you received this twice -- I received an error the first time I submitted.)

Hi,

I've been looking for some first-date ideas for a Saturday afternoon. I was thinking of the Galapagos Island 3-D movie at the Smithsonian and then lunch -- are there any good places nearby?

Do you have any other ideas?

Thanks!

The Going Out Gurus: What a nice date idea Rockville. And the perfect meal to follow up that great flick would be the Cafe Atlantico Latino dim sum feast. It's $19.95 per person and starts at 11 a.m. Enjoy!

DC: I just returned from a noontime walk to a the Sackler Museum, looking for a birthday present in their gift shop. The designer of the security plan seems to have lost his mind! My purse was searched for several minutes, while the guard remarked that nail clippers are now not allowed in the building.

Not surprisingly, the museum and its gift shop were empty. It was too depressing and I left without buying anything.

This is a classic example of kneejerk overkill. Ineffective, too, as the guard failed to find my contraband nailclipper. Are we going to destroy our city and our society in the name of security? And how will we trim our nails now?

The Going Out Gurus: Hi, D.C. This is Maura. Could you have just left your bag in coat check and dropped the whole thing? I am sorry your day was ruined, but I am afraid you aren't going to get much more sympathy from me. The guards are on high alert and have been asked to take every precaution. While at times this may seem extreme, putting up with it is how we do our part. I do hope you go back to the museum. The Sackler is really a splendor.

Fairfax, VA: Personally, getting out of the house has been incredibly therapeutic. Our first venture "out" (other than to go to work) was last Friday night when we went out to dinner with friends. While we did talk some about the week's events, we talked about other things too, and that felt SO good. Getting away from the TV was instrumental. I'm a CNN addict.

My husband and I are looking forward to some traditional fall activities - apple picking, winery visits, maybe a long weekend or two away.

In that vein, are there any outdoor things happening this weekend? Festivals, etc?

The Going Out Gurus: Hi, Fairfax, Anne here. You might want to see my suggestions to Tysons (above) on Sunday's Bike DC ride or Saturday's Arts on Foot festival, or to Bethesda on Mount Airy Mansion's Autumn Festival -- all happening this weekend. Another upcoming get-out-and-move option in your neck of the woods is next Saturday's Light the Night walk in Reston. (The DC walk for tonight was canceled, but the Reston one is still afoot.) Good ol' Americana festivals this weekend include Celebrate Loudoun and the Reston Multicultural Festival. Our colleage Wily went apple-picking last weekend, and relished the simple delights it can bring -- watching a toddler try to carry a huge, round apple that nearly weighed more than he.

Tysons Corner, Virginia: I saw the post on the Washington Symphony Orchestra and thought I'd post, too. The Virginia Chamber Orchestra, which is a renowned chamber orchestra, will be giving a free concert on Sunday, September 30th at 7 pm. The title of the concert is "Favorite Music from Film" and will feature music from "Shakespeare in Love," "Platoon," and the "Wizard of Oz." It's taking place at the Northern Virginia Community College at the Ernst (Community Cultural) Center. It should be a good opportunity to get out and enjoy the wonderful cultural opportunities that our area (and our country) provides!

The Going Out Gurus: Thanks Tysons. This is Kate and we'll add your event to our big calendar -- and not just because I think the "Platoon" soundtrack (Barber's "Adagio for Strings," am right?) is a beaut.

Dupont Circle, DC: An idea for those that want to go out this weekend... The National Heritage Awards will be presented on Friday at the Lisner Auditorium. To quote their website:

"We honor these artists not only for the excellence of their work but also for their
efforts to preserve our diverse cultural traditions for future generations," said Bill Ivey, National Endowment for the Arts Chairman. "Through these valuable contributions,they remind us that America's rich and varied cultural heritage is what makes us who we are as a nation."

It includes the award ceremony and performances. Best of all.. it's free!

The Going Out Gurus: Thanks Dupont, this is a great idea. Be advised though that while the event is free, there are no tickets remaining. Still, if you're willing to show up early and wait in line, you might get a seat. The show starts at 7:30 so get there early if you don't have a ticket and want to get in.

NW DC: where/what do single men do on the weekends (not bars) when they are looking to meet someone

The Going Out Gurus: I don't know if you're a man trying to meet men or other women or someone looking for men that are looking. (Huh?) Rhome here, and I can't speak for all menfolk but I know at least one thing that usually works for me. Go somewhere that you wouldn't normally go, but do so in the company of a female buddy. Your favorite homegirl usually has a social network of girlfriends that you can easily tap in to by virtue of the Good Guy Stamp of Approval you get from being her friend. It works the opposite way too. I've brought my best female buddies along to things I do that they're normally not into. They meet my male friends and their friends, and all of a sudden they've got a new dating pool, or at least a wider social circle (which is the best goal to pursue, we don't want to seem predatory, do we?). Wow, I sound like Carolyn Hax.

Washington, DC: For those interested in pursuits of a "rural nature", Prince William County is sponsoring "Farm Tours" this weekend at various farms throughout the county. A good plan would be to head out I-66 west past Manassas, then jump onto Rt. 55 west, looking for Farm Tour signs. Visitors to farms can buy farm fresh vegetables (including pumpkins). Check it out, it's great to get out into the country this time of year !

The Going Out Gurus: Sounds great, nice tip!

Falls Church: OK -- new topic. Can you give suggestions for close-in No. Va restaurants where outdoor seating is available so we can enjoy these glorious fall evenings? (Other than the 4 Provinces, which I love but want to branch out.)

The Going Out Gurus: Falls Church, Alexa here. Places with outdoor seating in NVA. In Old Town both Santa Fe East and Taverna Cretekou have very pleasant patios. And then, by the river with a lovely view of the city is Potowmack Landing. Or the Quarterdeck in Arlington might suit.

U Street: RE: burgers in Adams Morgan

Burgers at The Diner on 18th are pretty good, especially if you top 'em with something like cheese, bacon, or mushrooms. And you can get them 24/7. I'm a bit more fond of the cheesesteaks, though. With lots of runny gruyere.

The Going Out Gurus: Oki-doke.

DC: I disagree, I think going dancing is fine. Again, its about getting on with life, celebrating the life that you have. Going out for drinks and dancing is not disrepectful. Its about living your life to the fullest. It's about enjoying every moment you have.

The Going Out Gurus: We're having this same argument right now in our office, DC. (This is Fritz.) Some people can't comprehend going out and partying right now. Others can't bear to stay home and watch CNN for another minute.

I lived in London during a tense period of IRA actions. The student flats were near Baker Street station, and every time there was a bomb threat called in, we were told to evacuate the building. (I don't want it to sound like I was ever in serious danger, though, because I wasn't.) I lost count of how many times trains stopped running or stations and buildings were closed because of threats. But I admired the way everyone just got on and made the best of the situation. A friend of mine from the University of London said that they (the people of London) had never lost the "Blitz spirit." Very Churchillian. I subscribe wholeheartedly to the idea, and I don't think that's being disrespectful to the memories of the victims, as long as you don't try to pretend that the events of last week never happened.

Here's one last point to ponder: I've met people who have never gone to the 9:30 Club or Buzz because they were afraid of the neighborhoods in which the clubs are located; they'd feel unsafe walking from the car to the club. I've never let that stop me from going. Everyone has their own comfort/safety level, and we need to respect that right now, during this emotional time.

reston, VA: I'm going to Chicago tomorrow. Know any good
clubs? We're going to Buddy Guy's place, but I can only take so much blues. Any places where a Living Colour/Ministry/Nine Inch Nailsy kind of guy might like to go?

The Going Out Gurus: Oh, Reston. I (Maura) am envious, but I'll be making my own trip to the Windy City next month. After living in Chicago for a few years, hopefully I can still steer you in the right direction. If you can't handle more blues (I do suggest Kingston Mines if you can), the Empty Bottle on Western Ave. may be right for you. You could also try a little more low key at Schuba's on Southport (my old neck of the woods). Metro on Clark is a Chicago classic that witnessed the early days of the Smashing Pumpkins and Liz Phair. Hope that helps. Have fun. I know you will.

Alexandria: Any benefits/fundraisers/events scheduled for Northern Virginia? I can't work up the energy to venture all the way into DC, but would like to get out of the house.

Thanks.

The Going Out Gurus: Hi Alexandria, Kate here. The majority of fundraisers so far announced are taking place in the District. The ever-generous Austin Grill chain is planning on donating all monies (tips, pay checks, cost of food) next Tuesday. Don't fancy TexMex? Why don't you call up either Faccia Luna in Arlington or Old Town and book a big table for next Tuesday night. All three area Faccia Lunas have committed (as part of a large consortium of restaurants) to donate up to 5 percent of Tuesday night profits to the Red Cross through October 9. For all list of all restaurants involved go to our benefits page and scroll down to "on going."

Arlington, VA: Help! Where is there to go in Northern VA on a Thursday night with good drink specials (besides Whitlows, we go there EVERY week!).

The Going Out Gurus: Hello, Arlington. A few ideas for you: Thursday is Pint Night at Rock Bottom in Ballston. Buy one of their logoed pint glasses (full, of course, but the glass is yours to keep) for $4.95, and refills are $2 all night. There's a similar Mug Club special at Whitlow's, with $1.50 refills of Fosters. And there are $1 longnecks at Bungalow Billiards in Shirlington from 5-8. Hope one of those fits the bill.

Silver Spring, MD: What do you guys think of Bohemian Caverns? I saw it for the first time while sitting in my friends car and it looked cool. Is it a jazz club? Which nights are good there?

The Going Out Gurus: Kate here, Silver Spring, you've got to explore the Caverns (indeed a very cave-y underground club). It was reopened a year and a half ago after an absence of 30 years. It is a jazz club and it once booked the very biggest acts. I suggest that you take a friend or two on a Wednesday or Thursday night for happy hour.

And with that gentle readers, we're signing off. Thank you all for joining us. Have a safe and restful weekend.

Arlington, VA: For me, the best way to escape during this past weekend was with a bar night out. Reading this board makes me feel a bit guilty about that, but it was the best way for me to blow off steam. It certainly doesn't mean I'm oblivious to what happened last Tuesday. My two cents.

The Going Out Gurus: Thanks, Arlington.

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